There are so many things that people forget to tell you about post childbirth. It's not their fault, the situation is so temporary, and those weeks are easy to forget down the road. But as a new mom, the weeks right after you give birth can sometimes feel overwhelming--there are SO many adjustments physically, emotionally and hormonally. I made note of some postpartum things that hopefully can help women feel prepared and have listed items that were helpful to me with recovery.
However, if there's one thing that I have learned
--every woman's pregnancy, child birth and postpartum experience is completely different. The remedies below are from my particular situation, but may not fit all. My naturopath, Meredith Blalock N.D., advised me throughout my postpartum care and offices out of Edmond if anyone is interested in visiting her:
www.bluemountainhealthokc.com
*Note: The following is not for the faint of heart. The postpartum period comes with a lot of bodily adjustments, stop reading here if blood, poo, and breast milk coming from various parts of the body make you squeamish.
It's a...Placenta!
I had a friend who told me no one informed her that she had to deliver the placenta (your baby's life source inside the womb) after the birth. This is true with a vaginal birth. The placenta delivery usually happens anywhere from 5-20 minutes after child birth. In the midwifery world, most midwives wait to cut the umbilical cord until it stops pulsating--this is because there is oxygen rich blood being sent to your baby's lungs to help establish breathing. Some hospital nurses may or may not be in touch with this practice, but you can always make the request.
Post Bleeding
The same friend also mentioned that no one told her about post bleeding, this is also true. After childbirth, all women lose some blood, but the blood in our body increases by 50% during pregnancy so we are prepared for this blood loss. After your baby is born, "lochia" comes out--a mixture of blood, uterine tissue and bacteria. Clots can also pass through, especially after sitting for longer periods of time. Most lochia will come within the first few days, and then spotting and/or light bleeding can follow in the weeks to come. A cleansing bottle will usually be given to you to help dilute urine and help clean the vaginal area when using the restroom. It just looks like a small water bottle, and hot or cold water can be used.
Heavy-duty sanitary pads are good to buy before you give birth, that way you will have them during recovery. To help with soreness & healing: soak multiple pads with
witch hazel and put them in the freezer (separated by cling wrap). After birth, these can help in a few different ways. The cold compress is good for soreness, and the witch hazel contains catechol tannin that constricts capillaries beneath the skin's surface. On top of having good anti-inflamatory properties, witch hazel is also helpful with hemhorroid treatment, hemhorroids are common with pregnancy and child birth. To treat, apply witch hazel to gauze and gently apply to irritated area.
Magnesium can also aid in avoiding hemhorroid severity during pregnancy, and after child birth. My naturopath suggested 400 mg to be taken before bed. It also helped with the first bowel movement post birth, which can cause a sense of uneasiness, since the same muscles are used in both situations.
Nursing 411
Unfortunately, nursing is not as easy as most might think. Both mom and baby are learning to work together, and it definitely can take some practice on both ends. For me, nursing was painful for the first two weeks, but then it got much better. I would hear of moms falling asleep while feeding their baby, and I was in disbelief. Now, I am the one that is nodding off mid-nursing since the pain has left.
If you are set on breast feeding--hang in there. There's a reason why there are a million books, videos and resources on nursing, notice it's the longest category in this post. It is a
major adjustment. Know that there are tricks of the trade to help make it easier, so don't hesitate to ask a nurse, midwife, doctor or breast feeding consultant. As for Oklahoma City, The Green Bambino has monthly meetings to help moms with breast feeding. It is free and open to all and provides a good support network for families. I was fortunate to have my midwives come back over a couple days after Lelu was born, and Meredith came a few days after them. They all were able to double check that my baby was latching correctly and we were on the right track. With a hospital birth, nurses often help during the mom's stay, but there may be questions after you get home. Definitely reach out to someone for help--just reiteration and affirmation can really make a difference. A really wonderful blog that focuses on breast feeding and parenting topics is
www.kellymom.com.
There have been several posts and articles on here that have given good information.
Typically, you feed your baby every 2-hours until they surpass their birth weight. I felt like a human udder within those first few days, which is part of the adjustment. Fortunately, Lelu gained within the first week, and we had a bit more flexibility with the nursing schedule from there. My best advice is to make sure you're comfortable while nursing (this helps with baby's comfort too), and get creative with nursing positions once you're comfortable with nursing. The
side-lying has been the best for me during night time feedings, there are more photos and videos online to help guide you through this position and others.
Our doctor mentioned getting on a breast feeding schedule, which didn't end up working very well for us. As the apple doesn't fall far from the tree--my daughter loves to sleep and it can be next to impossible to wake her up. That right there would set us back from a feeding time anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour. In addition, she won't latch if she has an upset stomach, which can be normal as their digestive systems are adjusting. So after a week, I gave up on the schedule and began feeding her on demand--basically whenever she notified me she was hungry. This ended up being much less stressful for me, and has worked better overall. We may try a schedule when she gets older.
Primarily in the first few weeks, your nipples can become very sore with breast feeding--many moms told me theirs became chapped, cracked, and even bled. To avoid this, I made sure to apply
Lanolin after
every feeding. It was a lifesaver. I haven't had to use it as frequently going into week six, and it does stain, so
nursing pads were helpful. I used reusable nursing pads within the first few weeks, they are really soft, my favorites are "Bamboobies" from The Green Bambino.
It takes several days for a mother's milk to come in, and in the meantime, your body produces colostrum; this is a form of milk that is rich in protein and antibodies. Since newborns have immature digestive systems, the colostrum comes in low-volumes. Colostrum is harder to see than milk, and it can be difficult to feel like your baby is getting enough. I had medical professionals tell me it's okay to give my baby formula within the first few days before my milk comes in. I appreciated their advice, but I really didn't want to introduce Lelu to formula at that point in time. There was one story, my midwife told me, that helped me within the first few days of nursing--it helped me remember that our bodies, and our babies' bodies, were designed with purpose.
In 1985, the Juarez Hospital (Mexico City) collapsed after a major earthquake. Several newborns were pulled from the rubble days later with only minor injuries. They were called the "miracle babies" during this time, and although their survival through such a devastating event is nothing short of a miracle, it also shows how resilient newborns can be. Their bodies are filled with fluid and nutrients from the womb, and are designed to withstand the days during which milk isn't available. One of the many articles on the miracle babies can be found here:
http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1985-09-28/news/8503060040_1_newborn-baby-four-babies-infants
This information helped me avoid any anxiety over providing my newborn with what she needed, and I noticed my milk come in around 5-days later. Lelu did still like to suck after nursing, which I learned was just her way of self-soothing. Some of the main advice we received was to hold off on a pacifier until she adjusted to breast feeding. But within the first week, we went ahead and introduced one since she was latching just fine, and we weren't having any nursing troubles. The pacifier ended up being our secret weapon to a few extra hours of sleep. She calmed down very quickly in the middle of the night. So with this said--this was my first lesson not to "overt think" things, and different strokes work for different folks. I would say as a new mom,
give yourself some flexibilty with the ins and outs. One of my biggest resources has been advice from moms with multiple kids, the "what I wish I would have known with my first child." I take to heart their advice, and attempt to take a "second child approach" to my first baby. It helps me not to sweat the small stuff.
A really great tool has been the
iBaby Log, which is available for free on the iphone. You are able to track when your baby eats, sleeps, diaper changes, baths, etc. I primarily use it to keep track of feeding times and diaper changes, since it's important to make sure they are eating, and getting rid of waste, frequently throughout the day. My midwife and doctor told me Lelu should be eating at least 8-times within a 24-hour period. When you're nursing so much, it gets easy to forget times and feedings--logging the information can take the stress off trying to remember the details of your day.
Holy Meconium!
A newborn's first several bowel movements are made up of amniotic fluid, bile and shed skin cells collected from the womb. This is called meconium, and is dark in color and sticky and can be hard to wipe clean. If you have some
olive oil handy, sprinkle it on your baby's bottom before his/her first bowel movement and continue with each diaper change until the meconium has passed.
Growth Spurts!
I am so thankful my friend Elizabeth told me about growth spurts--I would have had no idea! Basically, babies can go through growth spurts the first few days while at home, around 2-3 weeks, 4-6 weeks, 3 months, 4 months, 6 months and 9 months. These times aren't the same for every baby, but it will give you an idea what may be going on if your baby is having an "off day" around these times. Lelu is fussier than usual, sleeps more, and eats every hour 1/2 or so. Therefore, if your baby is acting hungry not long after a feeding, they probably are--gotta feed those growing babies!
Knock, knock...
As mentioned above, the postpartum time can be overwhelming and filled with many adjustments. For us, it was very helpful to have a "company plan,"outlining when we wanted time for just the three of us, and when outside visitors were okay. Some of our company plan developed after we had Lelu, and some of it we had discussed prior, but it is good to keep a dialogue on when you want company and when you don't. We ended up taking visitors around lunch and dinner times, so we had the mornings, late afternoons and nights to rest. If you have a large family, it may be hard to juggle visits, but make sure to steer clear from people pleasing--the days after giving birth is a time for you (and spouse) to bond with your baby and get adjusted as a new family. Also, the majority of people are not in tune with the details that go into the days after child birth (again, it is easy to forget), so make sure to honor yourself and voice your needs. Here are a few things I found I needed right after Lelu arrived:
Privacy - you are physically still healing from most likely the hardest thing your body has ever done. Between bleeding, soreness, fatigue and nursing, privacy can be really important when dealing with all of the above. Don't feel bad asking for it.
Intimacy - As I mentioned above, the postpartum period is your time to get to know your baby, and for your baby to get to know you. There is plenty of time, in the long run, for extended family time bonding--so make sure to relish in the moments with your newborn and the intimacy with them and your spouse.
Courtesy - My midwives always say if someone is visiting a family with a newborn, they better bring food, a gift, or do a chore! As a new mom, all of your energy should go towards taking care of your baby and yourself--this means NO CHORES for two weeks! With this rule of thumb, your visitors should be courteous and help cater to this notion. If you feel you have to play hostess to anyone, or entertain, perhaps ask them to visit at a later time when you're energy level is fuller.
To wrap up the Post Childbirth Survival Notes, I'd like to add a link from a mom blog that I came across. She's a mother of three and gives 30 great pieces of advice for new moms:
http://awannabesupermom.blogspot.com/2012/03/30-pieces-of-advice-for-brand-new-moms.html
"No language can express the power, and beauty, and heroism, and majesty of a mother's love. It shrinks not where man cowers, and grows stronger where man faints, and over wastes of worldly fortunes sends the radiance of its quenchless fidelity like a star." ~Edwin Hubbell Chapin
